Whispering Smith Column published in the Littlehampton Gazette April 16th. 2015

SPRING has arrived in Littlehampton with the new Pier Road river walkway being a crowded favourite along with our super beach. But for me it was the return to the allotment, meeting old friends, digging, weeding, planting the beans, the spuds and, I do sincerely hope, shedding a few pounds along the way. With certain reservation, I do believe the town council are great providers and value for our money and never more so than with the continued provision of allotments, sure the bees are a pain – thrice experienced last year – and the wretched gate padlock that will often not respond to the issued key can be pretty frustrating but they are small potatoes compared to the benefits of the provision. Unlike Arun, the town council with its limited resources do seem to care about us and our needs. I guess this is because members actually do reside here whereas not one of the Arun cabinet members does. Butterflies, birds and the smell of new-mown grass, I am surely walking in tall cotton this week.

 THE GRIM REAPER in the form of Tesco is determined to drive another stake into the heart of Littlehampton. The superstore has applied for planning permission to erect a pod in front of its store in Broadpiece offering key cutting, shoe repair and watch repairs. If approved it will spell disaster for at least three businesses in the Beach Road area already under threat from overzealous Arun parking attendants. It will also open the door wide for the Reaper to apply for other services currently on offer in town. How crazy is that, might as well give the Town Centre Regeneration Officer his P45 and tell the last man out to switch off the lights.

 TALKING business there are now ten salons in Littlehampton where a man can get a haircut, four betting shops where he can lose his shirt and three large chemists where he can get some paracetamol to ease his pain from both of the above but not one decent gents outfitter or shoe shop. Go figure!

 THE doctor tells you this may cause you a little discomfort when what he really means, ‘Son, this is going to hurt.’ Doc, discomfort is a pebble in your boot!